Thursday, November 24, 2011

What if I'm not the hero, what if I'm the bad guy...





Hello from the USA for one of the last times..for a long time..
Tomorrow...Muffy and I will be Canadian! Well not legally, but we'll be drinking Molson, saying eh and we're already really pale so we got that covered. But before we get into that...I'll enlighten you on our lives from the past week or so...
Jackson Hole ended up being a really cool cowboy town...so much so that Muff and I had the urge to drink whiskey while listening to Johnny Cash. (?) And while writing out postcards to our loved ones...hence the even more than messy handwriting I usually have. Words came from the heart tho! Whiskey infused heart. But yeah we didn't really see much in the way of nightlife in Jackson because it was one week before the season started and it was a Tuesday or Wednesday. Still an awesome town and the Grand Tetons were pretty sweet! We walked off into uncharted territory in the national park and Muff thought it would be a good idea to talk about how shiddy (PG rated) it would be to see a bear out there on our own. Thats like telling a surfer thats all the way out in the break on a deserted beach to think about sharks. I told Muff I'd sacrifice her and run for it..mostly because I am the only one with the password to the blog.
After Jackson we drove through Idaho and up to Bozeman Montana for the night. Really short stop, just to rest up really and check out the hot springs they're supposedly known for. We were being typical naive tourists thinking that this meant that there was some magical hole in the ground, with warm water and with all sorts of fun colors, and probably Yogi the bear running it. To our surprise, mankind has taken a very modern way of opening up natural hot springs to the public, in the form of a spa. The whole place was like some sort of upscale LA celebrity detox center. You had like 6 different pools, which all are very much natural spring water, but it is in an indoor area with locker rooms and saunas and all. There was one outdoor one which was pretty sweet, like 95 degrees. After we were Lindsey Lohan-ing there we drove all the way to Spokane, Washington.
We couch surfed again with this cool chick Monika right outside of the city. She took us out to a bar that we would have never found otherwise called Babybar and it ended up with us shakeweighting in front of the apple store she worked at. Travel shakeweighting is gonna be a movement soon I can feel it. She was a good time though, thank you again couch surfing! 3-3.
We woke up the next morning before people were probably waking up in NY to reach the epitomy of our journey. It was our pilgrammage to Mecca, our birthright in a sense, our Eat Pray Love moment, our quest to find ourselves..........Forks, Washington...Population 3,175.
If you have never read or seen Twilight or are puking all over the computer from my last statement skip forward to where it says "safe to read..."
The journey into Forks was actually pretty fun. The state of Washington is easily underestimated..it took us nearly 8 hours. (We also passed a town called George. George, Washington ha). Anyway! Once we hit the Olympic Peninsula where Forks is so cleverly located we started to see some Twihards. Everything they say in the movie and books about locations is true. Forks is the wettest place in the continental US and is very far out of the way from major cities, the closest one is Port Angeles. And they are right next to the Quillete Reservation and La Push. Once we hit Port Angeles Muff started shrieking like a little girl, I didn't at all. Not once. First sign from Forks, forget about it. It was as if someone let Bieber run lose in an all girls school. The type that cry and throw underwear and stuff.
The area is actually really beautiful though. The forest, which is actually a rainforest, is exactly the way it looks in the movies. The lakes and mountains were some of the most picturesque we've seen on our trip! Once we rocked up to Forks, with the Twilight soundtrack obnioxously blaring, we headed to La Push for sunset. This was my favorite part of the area; the beach was incredible. The waves were massive, there was barely anyone around and there is so much nature present. It is literally on a reservation so nothing is built up which is nice to see, and the movie barely tweeked what the beach looked like. The city of Forks was a bit different; it was very quaint and hardly ruined by the Twihards. Buttt there wasn't a lot that was filmed here. It gave Stephypoo Meyers a lot of her ideas, but those ideas were stretched and filmed, in Vancouver. A lot of the things that were filmed in Forks were cool, and we may or may not have used Muffs flip camera to reinact the scenes..sober. The locals were really, really friendly though, and they don't seem to mind the Twilightness at all..in fact it made the economy better for their town and helping them chase dat paper. Good on ya, Forks. Some hotels even had overpriced Twilight themed rooms; this means everything from the wall paper to the toilet paper had R Patz, K Stew or Taylor Lautner all over it. Give me a Dakota Fanning room and maybe, just maybe I'll pay for one. She's legal, right? Sad to say Muffy and I stayed in a regular room that night...maybe we'll grace the Bella Suite with our presence next trip to Forks.
SAFE TO READ AGAIN
Once we left Forks I had to drive little Muffypoops to the airport. She had to go home for the week for a personal emergency so it was a good thing I had a wolfpack member living nearby in Olympia, Washingon! Natalie! Nat and her mom so kindly took me in for the week and I have been spoiled here. Real shower, home cooked meals, and on Demand. Yewww. Its nice to see someone from the East Coast again, and they've shown me a great time. Olympia's a fun spot and close by is Portland, Oregon, where we went for a night. Nat, her friend Erica, and I went on a bit of a pub crawl and introduced Nat to what a strip club was. There was a stripper with a tail, no joke. A purple, fuzzy tailed stripper. It was pinned on it wasn't like a growth or anything, but I would never think to include stripper and tail in the same sentence. Anyway eventually we went to a dubstep club. I thought I knew dubstep music until that moment. There is actually a whole nother world to it, I was taken back but could definitely respect it. The dancing was like taking Ke$ha, Bjork, and some zombies and making that outcome have a seizure. People really seem to like it though, and Nat said its a big Pacific Northwest thing. Maybe they're just ahead of everyone and its a thing of the future? Oh yeah and love the awkward moment when you get pinched in the butt and turn around to see it is purple fuzzy tailed stripper that you saw earlier in the night at her place of work. Small. World.
So here I am, all full of turkey and ready to embark on the next part of our adventure. I pick Muffalufagus up tomorrow afternoon and from there we head straight to Vancouver for a few nights to stay with our friend Dave that we met in Australia. Epic reunion in an epic city! Monday we are Whistler bound where we are job and apartment hunting till we find what we're looking for!
If you need to contact me please email or facebook me until I get a Canadian phone!!! We'll update the blog once we do some productive stuff in Canada. Hope everyone had a fabulous Thanksgiving and thanks for reading again if you made it this far!!
Peace, Love, and Tails xxxx

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